After he came all over my face, he proceeded to give me a high five. I can't even act upset because I always put myself in these situations. Did I mention D3: Mighty Ducks was playing in the background?
I like how you refer to peeing in the car as "super cute"
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
Bought a water-proof vibrator. Rubber ducky is no longer the one that makes bathtime so much fun.
My cha cha got a haircut
thank god. going down on you was like chewing on astroturf
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
Just checked an empty cooler on the flight to Notre Dame. You don't have to tell me you're jealous, I already know.
I ended up taking shots of whiskey and chasing them with potato wedges, I have never felt more Irish
Selling Girl Scout Cookies outside bars for higher than retail value has got to be the most profitable idea. Ever.
THE BIG GAY MAD HATTER IS HERE AND HE HAS DRUGS IN HIS PANTS FOR YOU. COME DOWNSTAIRS BITCHEZZZZ
Who the fuck was that guy he kept pulling his dick out walking up to people trying to hand it to people and saying go ahead open the door like it was a door knob
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
Randomize
