He asked about stds. I told him I don't have any... which I don't. They are now called sti's. Whooopsie
i was gonna tell him a really embarassing story about you, but then i remembered im in all of them
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
I decided to follow my clitoris instead of my heart.
Everytime I sleep with him he gives me another hint to what his tattoo means. I'm like a slutty Nancy Drew.
I only keep her as my best friend so she wont hook up with my ex.
I think that's the first time I've heard someone say "this is the safest way of doing things" while holding half a gallon of jagermeister
I am almost positive I asked to milk her when I was saying my goodbyes.
Ok I am NOT pregnant. I could shove coal up my vagina and my uterus would turn it into a diamond in a matter of minutes
I had to ask him for a dick pic. Do you know how refreshing that was?
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
Your mom has reinvented the use of a ping pong ball.
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
Well, you started screaming "I dont know you GO AWAY" to your mom when she was holding your hair as you threw up in her garden.
I don't want to just hook up with random dudes. I've had enough bad sex to know that it's not worth hooking up with strangers
It's not?
Randomize
