We have a vodka soaked ShamWow with your name on it.
Next time we go to the river, we nominate you to flash people for free booze. Your tits are the biggest.
He's been grabbing my ass as a greeting since 2004, sex was overdue
may have given a homeless man 70 dollars in exchange for his sandals. so yea, i'm going as jesus for next halloween.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
I had to watch them play Salty Cracker. I have never seen a grown man cry with a boner before
There's a mechanical bull in the basement dude where are you
Literally too hungover to pull out of the driveway. Tried 3 times and failed. I'm going back to bed.
I woke up in a bunk bed beside two Brazilians dude you have no idea how happy I was
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She told me I was absolutely not allowed to sleep with him even though she knows I'm a rule breaker who loves a good challenge.
I just watched my high school guidance counselor pee in the backyard of this party.
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
You know I was thinking and I've never seen a penis in a whirlpool before
easy for you to say. you're not the one who has to explain why you woke up with a pineapple and a used condom.
I don’t care how cute or big a guy is I’m done with drunken hand jobs. It was like I was pulling a nine inch bungee cord for 25 minutes. Now My arm and shoulder is dead
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