Got home from the bar at 4am. 100% sober, unlaid. Epic fail or responsible behavior?
Responsible fail?
he just said he'd buy the porn
its a step up from the last guy
I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
Tried to buy Xanax from my boss last night. Wrong Mike.
This flask doesn't match my outfit. I hope the gays don't mind.
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
Thanks for the drunken voicemail of bird calls. Love and miss you, too.
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
Oh my goodness please please please my inner slut needs some pampering, shes getting rusty and nothings worse than a rusty slut
I think mark twain said that originally
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
The report specifies "melted cheese food" as the cause of the burns. Your pride, like your cock, isn't getting out of this without heavy damage.
Randomize
