im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
We need to stop sleeping with people based on which NFL team they like.
he was holding his dick in one hand and my boob in the other and i looked down and thought, this is my life
You crossed every boundary on the boundary spectrum last night. You're like the illegal immigrant of drunk actions. No more holiday drinking for you.
I'll keep you from getting pregnant and you keep my papers gramaticallly correct
Yea I've gotten enough hickeys in my life to know what I'd look like with a neck tattoo. I think I'm getting a neck tattoo.
Did you miss the part about my hangover needing a day to rest?
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
just like fucking own it. stare that cop in the eye and just keep masturbating "yeah motherfucker Im high as shit and this feels great"
We were fucking in the boat on the lake when another boat saw us and honked their appreciation.
HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED
After passing out at the kitchen table, you woke up in my parents bed in between them. With no pants on.
Randomize
