She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
You're the only person I know who would say "we'll play it by ear" referring to a threesome
Just an FYI: The offer for you to come snow blow my driveway in return for sexual favors is still on the table
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
The used rubbers I threw behind her bed all semester must have landed on the baseboard heater. They went up in smoke when she turned on the heat last night.
I wouldn't blow him for all the queso in the world.
I'd rather blow that homeless guy who asked me to breast feed him.
I renamed his cat Jeff last night. Well I spray painted it on him.
oh god I've lost the ability to distinguish between 'star trek' and 'the future'
I'm dipping store brand pepperoni pizza in bacon flavored ranch dressing. Obesity tastes so good.
The magician guy on probation is here at the bar. I'm gonna get him to show me a trick
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
I refuse to believe you if you're trying to tell me humanity as a whole isn't sad, tired, and craving Chinese food.
you gave me money for the cab and then walked home..
Do you remember last night?
Just that I fell down a hill with my penis out and the emt talked to me.
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
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