Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
well I can't set my house on fire every night
wtf he couldnt undo my bra, i asked him if it was his first time and he said "with a girl? yeah"
NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
me and my mom are sitting in the bank parking lot drying my beer soaked check with the heat... the whole car smells like heinekin and I'm trying to convince her I don't need a.a.
I HAVE stop dating guys for their prescriptions, you have no idea how awkward family dinner was. Thank god for his xanax.
Your cousin just asked the bartender to start a round of vagina shots. Not body shots. Vagina shots. We're taking her out more often.
He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.
"DO YOU LIKE FLYING KITES" WORKED AS A PICKUP LINE. SUCK IT.
dude, my hangover is telling me there was tequila involved
I tried to break it off with the married one. He offered to pay off my car.
The side bitch struggle is real.
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
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