My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
My poor mother should have just stuffed me back up her vagina when she had the chance.
when I woke up she was standing in the living room with a bottle of scotch because she is "allergic to hangovers"
drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
I'm shutting down my vagina temporarily...it's like the last two weeks were a going out of business sale...and now it needs a break...
I am trapped in a bar with french tattooed drug dealers who also blow glass art. Just in case this is bad, know what happened.
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
Fuck you come back. The old guy next to me is complementing me on my great choice of ring fingers,
She walked home carrying a six pack of beer and someone elses cat
SHE BETTER HAVE BROUGHT BACK MY FUCKING COUCH CUSIONS OR SHES GUNNA GET IT.
You've seen the quality of dick pics I normally get. The bar is high.
the fact that you beer bonged rum made me so proud, the fact that you threw up an entire footlong tuna melt after... not so much babe
we got cockblocked by his mom again...its like she has a radar on me
please stop trying to sleep with him
I was trying to get nudes from last night and ended up getting a family portrait!
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