How does everyone that never saw me naked know I'm built like a smurf?
This random guy asked me if I had downs. I was like up yours! And I got out of his car.
ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
jess passed out on the pong table. it was depressing until we started singing shania twain an hour later and heard her muffled voice singing along.
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
I feel like a cloud. A cloud that wants to be laid.
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
what's the least obnoxious place that i could barf on the bus?
Oh I know babe. You're shining beacon of adult responsibility. That's why I go down on you.
I go down on you because abs
it was just another one of those moments where you unfriendzone a friend you assumed to be gay
Dicks are not precious.
Eat, nap, & pace yourself. Words to live by.
Randomize
