i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
Right before we were going to have sex he said it was his "lucky condom" I don't know if that means its used or what.. But I'm freaking out either way.
my momz letting me make the christmas card in photoshop
so that means christmas in space?
imma make our dead cats ghosts like obi wan kenobi
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At some point last night was I riding a garbage can.. Things are starting to come back to me
on the way home I asked you what exit we get off at and your answer was "just like the goldfish"
oh, so if i go friday and she's there, you are going to be my sponsor for not banging the crazy chick
He's gotta be able to drive a truck, make me mac n cheese and give me the best orgasms. That's my perfect man
We hotboxed his closet and accidentally lit some of his shirts on fire... do we have a fire extinguisher?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That is NOT what pussyfooting around means. Try that again with your toe and I break it off.
Telling the family you're going for a run, getting dressed in workout clothes, and then walking halfway around the block and smoking a joint. This is my life
Well, I woke up on a roll-away, with a knot in the back of my head and penis confetti stuck to me. Also, I apparently literally gave the shirt off my back right before I passed out, so I was topless. Vegas won this trip.
Not sure when or why this happened but I just stopped giving a shit about everything
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
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