My morning has consisted of lying in a fetal position, eating a whole tub of ben and jerry's, talking to my cat, and setting all of our pictures on fire. Does that answer your question?
They have edible shot glasses at target.
There really is a God.
Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
Somehow I feel more guilty using her razor then I do having sex with her boyfriend...
I'm watching i used to be fat. I've been doing crunches for the last half hour yelling at the slut on tv to stop crying and do crunches.
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
Put you drinking hat aside for Tuesday. My buddy is bartending!
I just puked in my drinking hat.
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
She's dipping the chocolate graham crackers in marshmallow vodka for a 'campfire taste'
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
Mom, I'm really sorry you saw my naked ex-boyfriend in the living room this morning. I can explain....but I'd rather just stick with this apology and be done with it
I took a 19 year old to a strip club and ended up in a three way. Divorced life might be OK.
You informed me your place was now a nudist colony and unless I was there to drink schnapps with the cat I had to strip.
The beauty of his penis is distracting me from the fact that he was born after Princess Diana died
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