I'm gonna do things to you that will make the neighbors want to move.
I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
Penelope Cruz needs to learn American words.
The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
You told him your wedding ring was part of your costume. not okay!!
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
The cop refused to sing with us, even though he was as happy as we were that the tow truck finally showed up.
Swear to god this chicks brother got let out of jail for the weekend for the sole purpose of cock blocking me
alicia just called me and talked to me in "the eternal language of the dinosaurs" and then kind of roared and gurgled. what kind of 4th of july are you guys having?
the boozy kind. is there any other?
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
I have a pair of clean panties in my purse. This is having your life together.
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
Just fantasized about my boss's fingers in a meeting. I desperately need to get some.
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
Randomize
