He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
im on my way to getting "i just graduated college with no money, no job, and no plan" drunk
i dont know you, but i just did a line with your business card.
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
you haven't felt a hangover until you wake up after a night of snorting tequila.
there seems to be a considerable amount of hair missing from my left hand. i may have lit it on fire again
That reminds me of that one time you handcuffed me to a table leg while I was reaching for the vodka.
Hey, remember when Hot Stuff played in the back of the ambulance? Or no, cause of your concussion...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You got called a pussy at a party with a slow cooker, you can't let that shit slide
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
I SHIT YOU NOT a mailman helped me leave without waking him up.
Nope I went the fuck home like an adult
I felt like I needed to shower with a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser.
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
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