I served up a girl her first a2m the other day. You would have been proud.
My New Years Resolution was to get a girl I dont know pregnant. 8 months later I can check that off the list..
I sometimes forget that turkeys are alive even when its not Thanksgiving.
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
Whatever is fine with me, as long as I am dressed in green and end up shitfaced.
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
in my defense i said 'lock up your wives' before going out.
Just say you're the husband at the front desk to get in. She's in room 15 at the ER.
what? who is this?
if creating a fake 8 year old brother, who lives with me and has had mono for the past month, to explain why I have ignored my group project members is wrong, then I... well then I'm probably going to hell
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
For future reference. Do not congratulate the bar tender at oscars she is not pregnant she has just gotten fat u will get a shot thrown in your face
I don't need my coworkers thinking I'm a nutcase.
You gift wrapped a tampon.
Is it bad form to spend company money and place an ad in the paper because I wanna nail the sales girl?
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
He fucked me so well and hard that the couch slid into the Christmas tree. I had to pull branches out of my hair.
Randomize
