Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
I just told the 2nd grade class leprechauns are the children of midgets.
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
you gave the police officer your chanel wallet and said 'just keep it the i.d. is fake too'.
This is where you say "Why yes we will drink with reckless abandon and hopefully not be in a church parking lot again."
Finding that toy duck there was weird right?
I have invented a new game to play on campus. It's called "Mormons or Pledges?" It's fantastic.
I'm supposed to nail the old lady at 1:30 so I'll see you at 1:35ish.
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
I just woke up naked next to a GetGo sandwich and I can hear my cats are eating my combos. So that's my life.
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
You know you turned your life around when your drunk eating salad at 3 am on a Friday night
u would mumble something and then get unnecessarily loud and say random shit like 'id fuck the shit out of taylor hanson right now'
are you still alive?
no.
i'll cry at your funeral. and leave a burrito by your tombstone
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
Drunk. Come get me. Out front blue shirt.
Where are you? And you borrowed my shirt. I know what you're wearing. How wasted are you?
Hotel
WHICH HOTEL??
Randomize
