Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
false alarm. still invincible.
why was he too nerdy?
he was a tetris block for halloween
If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
Note to self: never do anything I don't want to explain to a paramedic
I walked in on her just letting her nose bleed into her friend's hands
I borrowed a glass of wine. And the bottle. Your cat said it was ok
Thing I said while arguing: I want to be single again so that I can have pizza and dick rained down upon me.
Pulling out all the stops on being a lady.
If my bootycall doesn't bring over a Baconnator, I swear to fucking God, I'm not letting him in. The hunger is that real. Forget his Persian dick.
my confident boosted when he told me that it was I who started making out with him. ME. NOT HIM.
I AM SHOCKED AND PROUD OF MYSELF
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
Dude I used amphetamines responsibly today though. I snorted one in the am for work and then chewed one in the pm for other work. I'm an adult.
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
I woke up handcuffed to a bed wearing nothing but an army belt. Does this count as thanking our country?
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