Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
yeah my parents were only ten feet away and we somehow managed to do it in five different positions without them noticing
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
She makes me want to have breakfast margaritas every day
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My warmest regards to the fish in that koi pond I puked in.
I come back into the room and you're grinding with the person in the mascot suit.
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
Well, when he's back from China he's probably gonna be pissed I used the spare key he gave me to prove to everyone I'm fucking an NBA player. We took all his booze too.
The stoned girl at the dining hall just handed me a single chicken wing and insisted that she's "unable to procure more rations"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do I not have a Brazilian bc of my boyfriend situation or do I not have a boyfriend bc of my brazilian situation?
I lowered my expectations when he started off saying "ah missionary, my specialty"
There are peanut butter donuts now. We are playing with forces we can't possibly understand.
I feel like I shouldn't be left around 30 year olds when I'm drunk
We played 2 very competitive games of Jenga and then fucked our brains out... BEST. RELATIONSHIP. EVER.
I was not drunk enough for that final.
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