I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
i think a pirate just stole the rest of our fucking beer. what an appropriate costume.
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
No, he's ok. He just broke his teeth on the stripper pole. No biggie.
Passed out drunk in a tanning bed...
Did At The Beach call the fire department to get you like last time?
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
Nothing says happy valentines day like waking up to a naked man you hooked up with taking a walk of shame
I changed his contact info to "NO" and a picture of satan
just got a call from a life insurance sellsperson and apparently our xany dealer referenced us. not cool thats breaking the 4th wall
Then he said,"I love you like a sister I like to have sex with."
Just had an oven catch fire while I was balls deep. Fire department came, I did not.
The twitch Bob Ross stream is the happiest little hangover cure ever.
So, I can officially cross "getting eaten out in a church confession booth" off my bucket list.
Randomize
