so she proceeds to puke everywhere, look up at me like a sick dog, and then say, "i'll finish if you want me to."
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
So many bounce houses so little time
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
Well I knew we were drunk when I told you it was a good idea to shit in the ocean
I like my landing strip. Makes me feel sophisticated.
What you did last night can never be called sophisticated. I don't care how you trim your pubes.
this is why ugly people need low self esteem. it stops them from doing shit like this.
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
i just remember sliding through the snow and yelling i love america before puking on the oncoming cars
Just came so hard my back cracked. Other women are totally missing out if they don't masturbate.
When we were having sex last night, I told him I would replace him with tacos
No we were too stoned to stop you from wiping the peanut butter all over the car.
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
Fuck him. He can bang that skeezer all he wants. Fuck her lawyerness I’m a YouTube star
Randomize
