Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
Bleh. If he hadn't ascended into heaven and sat at the right hand of the father, Jesus would be rolling over in his grave right now.
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
Last night was proof dads should hug their daughters more
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
As you were leaving the bar you grabbed a table and when they stopped you, you said "Its cool i came in with this". They did not believe you.
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
the cops were hovering over him then shinned a flashlight to the floor above ours, then I realized that some fucker jumped from the third story.
fuck our hall.
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
Dude. I'm no longer allowed to use my sword when drinking. I just spent 20 min cleaning up popcorn. I stabbed Moe in the leg and chopped his door knob off
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
The amount of illegal things I've done this weekend is astounding.
Randomize
