They just gave us root beer floats. I guess I won't quit my job today.
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.
We are casual work acquaintances that occasionally fuck when the urge strikes. CWATOFWTUS. I know FWB rolls off the tongue better but it is what it is.
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
Hungover like ... in bed with the Brita pitcher and a straw, only opening one eye at a time.
If you were wondering whether I accidentally FaceTime called the undergrad who works for me in lab during a particularly graphic blow job last night, then the answer is yes.
Nobody is stopping the marines from drinking in class on veterans day. They literally brought a cooler with a bottle of whiskey and vodka on ice. And are passing out red cups to anyone interested. Staying in Vegas for college has officialy become an A+ decision
I'm so tired of waking up with my bed full of deli meats.
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
He's under the table sobbing because he doesn't live in a taco if you ever get him this high again I will stab you
Of the two of us, which one has licked a drag queen's tit in the past 5 days?
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
I said I wanted pizza tattoo on my ass and the tattooist asked me what I wanted on it.
I'm sitting here drinking whisky and listening to The Wiggles, I don't need a social life
Randomize
