The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
I had a dream last night that Anthony Bourdain gave me a vibrator.
I'm going to shit on something weird... I can't wait
I just watered my plants with apple juice. Look what you made me do.
Just bought plan B with a coupon. Told the pharmacist I like to keep it classy.
Every day you talk to me ... I literally love you more..
My dora the explorer band aid does not cover up the shame i feel right now
thanks for texting me "so many asians" at 1am...
there were a lot.
Thru out the entire phone conversation I went from thinking: he's making a gay come-on, to he's trying to sell me drugs, before realizing he was offering me a job with an internet company. Things are gonna be awkward in class this week.
the bar just sent me a facebook message congratulating me on being a regular and getting such good grades. my life is not real.
Drinking with mariachis at jimmy johns.
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
I fell asleep while studying last night and woke up smelling like whiskey and sex... words can not describe how confused I am
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
because. if I can't sit outside naked and eat my watermelon every morning then I really don't see the point in moving in with you.
It's very disconcerting to wake up and she is gone. I never know where she could be. It's like playing wheres Waldo but Waldo could potentially be drunk and wandering around in weird places that normal Waldo's don't go.
Randomize
