i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
He tried to eat me out in the bath... I said it was a bad idea, but he said it was good snorkelling practice for vaca.
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
Kurt said to text you and encourage you to come out tonight. Encourage you with my rack.
currently waiting for her to check in on Facebook, the second she does I'm there. someone is getting laid tonight
I'm not stalking, she is pretty much begging me to come find her if she checks in
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
If your plan is to re-bang every girl you banged in high school - you're gonna need a spread sheet and clip board.
I tried to pay my tab and go home but she wrote me a "list of things I'm good at" with fellatio as no 1...
I think I just gave my niece a weed pinata...
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
no he just sat there holding the hammer and grinning insanely
Yep. The ghost of my sex life is in your house.
I think you'll appreciate my way of waking up today: Under my cubicle, boxed in by boxes of printer paper, and hung over. I don't even know how the fuck I got in here in the middle of the night. I went to my car and fell back asleep. I'm now 2 1/2 hours late.
Randomize
