I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
i saw a stretcher and literally ran around for 10 minutes telling people it wasnt for me
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He sent a pic, I sent one back. Then nothing. It's like we sext-messaged goodbye and ended the relationship.
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
The only way I'll cross anything off my to do list today is if I write 'eat melted cheese' on it
Also I think I realized when my life started to turn into shambles.. The day I took my high school senior picture WITH A HICKEY ON MY NECK
I successfully navigated a full, lengthy interaction with my dad in which he never asked me if I was freshly baked. 10 points.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
I also farted in bed this morning and said, "I don't even care. My body deserves that."
My butt remains clenched, sir.
You have a husband. I have a bag full of electronics. This, is the single life.
Yea. You locked yourself outside naked with nothing but running shoes and claimed it was a "parent trap thing."
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
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