today's thought: if you're naming your fb album "wEdDiNg dAy!!!!!!" you're too young to get married
the best part was when he threw his debit card on the table, looked at everyone and said "turn this into pizza!" It felt like a scene in a 'coming of age' teen comedy.
and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
you kept making us tell you how cute you looked in your new outfit, even after you threw up all over it
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
My dinner guests were so drunk they never realized that I inadvertantly put Frosted Mini Wheats on the salad instead of crutons.
i have a picture in my phone of you with a bottle of tequila in your back pocket. i believe you were saying "pocket of champions" or something along those lines
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
Just burnt my nuts with a cigarette. Don't ask. I hate life.
Our house rule in beer pong, is that if you get the ball in the bitch cup.... you have to snapchat your balls to everyone on your friends list.
And thanks for putting me in that safety position on the bathroom floor while I was spooning the toilet
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