i may or may not have been spotted by tourists while getting head in the vicinity of the jefferson memorial
I hope you never procreate. Philly is already the ugliest city in the country.
Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
Katy Perry is on a Proactiv commercial. That "I kissed a girl" shit is so much less hot now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im at the hospital with monitors on and a giant green top hat. i blew a 24somethin. Im fucked.
you were watching the nanny crying, saying I wish I was that thin eating twinkies. THAT DRUNK.
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
I transported a midget tonight. He got beat up by another, midgetier midget. Is it bad that this is what makes me feel compassion after 15 years of being a paramedic?
Midgetier?
Smaller, yet meaner.
In lieu of flowers, please donate to The Hungover Children's Fund in my name.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
I have a guy for practically everything... except for making me waffles on demand. will u be my waffle guy?
Remind me to talk to you about nipple clamps.
Nothing says "Jesus has forgiven your sins" like finding out you're not pregnant on Easter.
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