kristin has been a bad kristin
he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
Did we both pass out talking about cake last night?
the doctor brought back painful memories by lecturing me about your teeth marks that are still on my dick.
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
Its okay I walked into your house, searched for my wallet in your purse, and took a shot of Tequilia all without eye contact, right?
They're re-releasing Titanic in 3-D. Can I interest you in a joint venture to create the greatest drinking game of all time? I think yes
Casually brushing the Bacardi out of my hair. It's a good time to ponder regretting everything that happened last night.
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
Can I come over and use your shower? My roommate got drunk last night and took my bathroom door off its hinges
No we didn't talk. I was high and doing naked yoga in the living room when she walked in so it was just awkward. I didn't even know my dad had a girlfriend.
You have my heart. You only share my vagina.
Thanks to you I can't show my boobs tomorrow for the interview.
You came in wearing a whipped cream bikini what did you think would happen
You're moving up the public shitting ladder
What does it mean when the bartender gives you 4 straws?
Randomize
