Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
The professor just announced to the class that I talked to him in the bar on my birthday.
New game: Step 1) Turn on ESPN. Step 2) Drink every time someone says "LeBron."
Was waiting for the adderal to kick in then realized I had been brushing my teeth for eighteen minuites
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
Hey can we break in your window? We need to borrow the dog.
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
We've gotten 3 pitchers already by trading for CUPCAKES
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
Do they still have sex clubs in San Francisco? Because that'd be an interesting way to spend Easter.
I wanted to buy shoes but nothing fit. So i'm getting a vibrator.
someone stole my phone at the bar last night, naturally, it led to me waking up in the bartender’s bed
I just got yelled at by a stripper for being a tease.
My GF, FWB and Side piece are all booty calling me. I’m a victim of my sexual success
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