It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
Did the game of beer pong go wrong before or after the cops and fire department showed up?
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
almost got into it with the cashier. bitch dont look at me like that just cuz im only buying wine and icing. ill fight.
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
my professor saw me buying beer for the super bowl and said go patriots. thats how i know im getting an A in his class.
Best surprise in my car. A cookie, sliced kiwi and the rest of my margarita. Work is going to be awesome.
I just traded ecstasy for trapeze lessons...you in?
My new boobs got me 12 drinks at the concert. Whose the real winner here?
I just had a drunk lesbian experience.... How do I break it to my boyfriend??
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
I don't care how many things you caught on fire, it's still not as bad as doing coke and then filming yourself having sex.
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