A little boy walked by his parents room one night, looked through the keyhole, and said "and that bitch tells me to stop sucking my thumb!"
Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
my mom just walked in on me furiously masturbating while reading twilight. needless to say, im officially out of the closet.
I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
i would think by now you'd realize that my penis does whatever the fuck it wants and i have no control over the situation
its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
Please tell me I did not ask the bartender how big his dick was.
My boyfriend correctly calculated the time I would be out of alcohol and showed up about four minutes after I'd run out with two bottles of wine. I think this is love.
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
I keep confusing the name of her and her dog. Both are appropriate.
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
When he identified himself as captain clitoris i knew my night was fucked.
He flipped a shopping cart in the back room and had to leave to make a jazz playlist. If we aren't in love then i don't know what love is.
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