I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
Vaginas are confusing as hell with all their secret compartments and shit.
I'll get my vaginal cartography poster.
We started snorting MDMA at 3 in the afternoon...it was never going to end well.
Just crossed the line from casual pregrame to public intoxication. Shotgunning in a bus shelter.
He sent me an email apologizing for sleeping with her...and by that I mean he sent a picture of his dick to my school e-mail
i have two emotions: emotionless and blind with rage
Seriously. We gorilla glued our hands together. Eating pizza last night was impossible.
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
The bottle of Jameson may have been a bit aggressive for a Sunday cookout.
U have successfully fucked my brains out. I just almost put deodorant on like chapstick
Remember when you gave their 80 year old doorman a line of molly at 5am?
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
Fucking hate kids. In particular I hate our kids.
Visiting my great uncle went well. The highlight of the evening was when he said, "Oh my god. I'm 79 and I'm teaching 18 year old kids how to roll a joint."
Randomize
