Kareoke will never be a sober sport
Don't fret. That vag would have consumed a lesser man.
IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT
Buying a large dominoes pizza for a wasted 3 mile walk is the best bad idea ever. My mouth is on fire, probably broke my hand, and i may or may not have eaten street pizza.
How did you break your hand eating pizza?
Boxes are hard to see rocks through.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he's measuring my pool to see how much jello powder he needs. He got paid today.
I'm in a waiting room at the hospital - and there's a dude here who is WAY too proud of his urine sample.
Just realized I used a picture of my little sister to holler at a guy, only 3 months old and she's already my wingman.
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
I'm now using my vagina for good, not evil. Trying to restore balance to the force.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
I've officially slept with/dated two guys that have gotten tased. What the fuck is wrong with me
I realize my mistake but don't you dare school me in cock, young man
Why is there a business card for people who need bail bonds in my wallet...
The cure for a hangover evidently is not walking around in a costume in the sun towards of park of screaming children
Used my power pack to charge my vibrator so I didn't have to unplug my switch or my galaxy lamp. TECHNOLOGY!
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