Say something about gay babies.
her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
Want me to give your number to an army recruiter?
I don't know... do you want me to use your number to sell used gay porn on Craigslist?
I sense beginning a prank war would end badly for both of us.
I don't know what to be prouder of: the fact that last night i was able to successfully find my way home from evanston with 3-d glasses on, or that i was able to make my way around my house in the dark with my pants around my ankles
doing shots of $6 a bottle whiskey and chasing it with milk. my own personal way of saying fuck life.
I walked around with red solo cups on my feet, weeds tied around my neck and a tree in my hand
Drunkness level: fluent in olde norse
I can't. Currently naked covered in Nair trying desperately to catch his cat that rubbed up on my leg.
I hate that cat.
He's super sweet. I feel like I'm dating Elmo. If Elmo had a 7 incher
Justin just used the term "industrial strength colon blow".
Dude you're fine. You're 5 minutes away from your house and you're eating fig newtons
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
Got caught peeing in public. Sucks. It was a police station. Sucks worse.
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