id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
I am so fucking pissed, there are no Shamwows in the As Seen on TV Store.
Looks like you'll have to stick to jizzing in socks.
Note to self: Not getting laid all weekend makes girls in mondays classes racks seem enormously bigger.
Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
my mind is a poorly written porno when i'm drunk.
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
I was just told that i'm a premature cuddler. . . What does that even mean?
Whatever it is you failed
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
you said, 'he held out his hand, that means we don't have to pay' about the taxi driver, and then asked the doorman what happened to your pants...
NO FUCKING RANDOMS IN AN ALLEY
in the middle of telling this chick to sober up i was shotgunning beers. im gonna be ab awsome nurse.
Of course his biggest mistake was assuming that I ever gave a fuck to begin with.
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