My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
felt a little awkward waiting for my McNuggets after vomiting all over the counter
I can see why you broke up with her now... it was like having sex with a corpse.
He just said "fuck you" to the bowl he's eating things out of
Woke up to pictures of me cooking wings with a blow torch.
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
We can do this. We've been drunk at a gay bar, we will not be taken down by a Tuesday.
We're shaving superhero symbols into our pubes. I call dibs on Batman.
He said he didnt want to choke me, I said im sorry thats a deal breaker.
She's really sweet and cute, but when she drinks, she becomes way too proud of her bush.
I remember telling you that I think Taylor Swift has stolen my essence. I still think that's true.
I wouldn't marry anyone who wouldn't symbolically fuck a doughnut with a sausage though.
One time she showed me her pierced nipples in our high school locker room and now she has a daughter
This drunk girl kept yelling for water so I dipped a cup in the toilet and gave it to her. She was thanking me all night.
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