oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
honey bunches of taint.
Im at a party and this guy hitting on me just showed me his 'caution choking hazard' tattoo right above his penis. There goes any chance he had of getting laid tonight.
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
Your a horrible friend, i only tried to do the right thing by moving you off the floor.. that was not an invitation to puke all over my bed and attempt to use my dog to mop it up.
I think, at this point, getting pissed and declaring my love via reality TV would be an improvement
After arriving 30 minutes late, he slowly walked to his desk and halfway there he just falls over like a tree and passes out. I now have some sort of proof as to how awesome that night was.
I feel like passing out with my foot on your face has bonded us at a very fundamental level.
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
And besides a nice relationship, I just really want to get laid damnit
For starters i called the cops on myself for trying to destroy the ladys decorations
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
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