I can't watch pbs sober anymore
I guess i tried to text 911 last night with "someone stole my bong." Thank god that doesn't work...
Apparently I joined a band last night. Definitely my favorite blackout.
you try finding a go kart track at 4 AM on Thanksgiving
Uhg.. This isn't fair. I just want to have sex with you until i lose consciousness, wake up and start over... is that so much to ask?
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
I'm going on a valentine's date with the random guy i hooked up with in the bar bathroom this weekend...i feel like julia roberts
And drunk me decided to play keep away with sober me's dignity
Currently cooking 3lbs of bacon in case the power goes out bc if even one slice of bacon goes to waste then sandy wins
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
As your friend, who loves and cares for you, I have to be honest. I am judging you so VERY hard right now. Sorry.
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
Some days, I wish I could get a hug from a furry muppet
It was a "have 911 on speed dial" kinda night
Randomize
