I'm not to broken up about it. Our relationship was worse than a coldplay song.
Woke up to a denim duvet cover this morning... why r guys so tacky?
great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
You know, it doesn't really count as a walk of shame if you guys showered together the next morning
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
I HAVE A PIGEON IN MY JACKET.
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
I made $80 at the club last night by telling him he was like a wild pony and I just wanted to tame him
WHY ARE THERE NO BLACK EMOJIS? I CAN NEVER PROPERLY IDENTIFY MYSELF.
Pretty sure I'm about to get another tattoo. It'll have mom in there somewhere for Mother's Day.
It took me three days, but I managed to nearly get arrested on my way out of LA. Made it to the airport. Crisis averted, though. The real crime is, my flight is delayed two hours.
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
But we made up last night and had unbelievably crazy sex tonight. I legit went blind for like 15mins from him choking me. It was awesome
I often worry that if I get famous, people from my past will recognize me and start talking to the media
The thought of you trying to procreat frightenes and disgusts me!
Randomize
