That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
I will make out with the first guy who tries to pick me up with a lyric from a rap song. I won't even reply, just be on him like whoa.
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
I was about to send you a concerned-for-your-safety text b/c it took you more than ten seconds to respond to a text that mentioned both the bar and lesbians
How did "just two beers for happy hour" turn into naked backyard wrestling?
Drunk me made out with someone's girlfriend last night, was invited to their place for a semi-threesome, and then walked home at three am. Can't decide if this is better or worse than drunkenly challenging everyone to taekwondo sparring matches...
I shaved my legs and got a bikini wax, I don't care what I take home as long as it has a penis
You should know two things about me,,,1) I am highly sexual and 2) I am HIGHLY competitive so you telling me about how much sex you had with the other girl makes me say "challenge accepted"... you should hydrate.
I don't intentionally mean to ruin relationships for personal gain but. Yeah nah I totally do.
He told me that he wants to fuck me only wearing a princess tiara...How could I possibly say no to that?
I'm wearing a sports bra. Of course I'm not getting laid tonight.
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
Randomize
