Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
this is a mass text: i just made a grilled cheese with an iron and pasta with the coffeemaker in the hotel room. bow before your new god.
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
You were doing karaoke. Then you screamed "SHOUTOUT TO ADAM LAMBERT" and started making out with the very surprised looking guy next to you.
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
Also, beer. Big fan.
We're both clumsy. What does this imply for our kids?
Helmets.
I'm about to make existential crisis tacos.
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
Do me a favor and scream dirty things at him in a polite sexy, come hither way
My mom just said "okay girls, the ONLY thing i ask is that you stay sober Saturday afternoon, until halfway through lunch. And you don't wear that crystal camo hat. This is a funeral, not a tailgate party"
Best wishes.
you tried to drunkinly do the backflip kick off of karate kid and broke the big screen
It finally happened. Some guy just tried to catfish me with my own dick pic. Of course I told him that it was the hottest dick I'd ever seen and that I would do anything for that particular dick.
I remember turning to Jon after doing a line of coke and saying "I was a Girl Scout"
Randomize
