i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
Tall, dark & handsome can suck my short, pale & awkward dick.
i an so hammered right now. I'm about to pass out but i just found the lion king dvd and i'm so happy words don't even describe.
I'm gonna name my first kid mufasa regardless if It's a boy or girl
just woke up to overhearing her on the phone saying "yeah we fucked last night, that makes 42." should i get tested?
well i fucked her too, so yes.
You compared your dick to a twizzler. In no way, shape, or form is that a turn on.
you could never motorboat her...you'd have to motor-titanic her
He tipped the stripper with quarters. After that not even the waitress would talk to us. I had to move to another table to get a lapdance
fun fact of the day: the man setting up my checking account at my bank has thrown up on my front lawn.
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
The cops said we could pay $250 or spend the night in jail and get 2 free meals. I might pee in mail-boxes more often
yea, there's something about a stripper whipping you with your own belt that makes you think
This girl braided my pubes while i was asleep. Now i cant get them undone.
Do you know how awkward it is to get a dick pic while working at babies r us?
i woke up this morning wearing my pants as a scarf and my shirt as a daiper, my boyfriends contact name in my phone is "human sacrifice" and yours is "i like eggs"....can someone please tell me what happened last night
WHY THE FUCK DOES RICKY'S BROTHER GET AN ENTIRE POT OF PASTA FOR BEING SHIRTLESS AND ALL I GET IS ARRESTED?!
Randomize