No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
Ryan Howard.... the only guy who struck out more than me this weekend
Just saw some guy walking down the street rapping about various types of pasta.
Being back home for the summer opens up so many opportunities to have sex without increasing my number
After we did it I noticed she was wearing the same underwear as last night.
That's why you don't sleep with the same girl two nights in a row man!
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
I know I should be focused on nurturing their bright little minds but it's 10 a.m. and I need a cock in my mouth
hungover and i feel like a burrito
like eating one or like you are one?
like i am one.
I'm gonna take my bong and hot box the pirate ship in the daycare playground.
I suppose I should wish you a happy one year of bumping uglies
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
just ran into my drill sergeant from basic 4 years ago. gonna take him home and have him fuck me at the cadence of quick time.
You drunk-dialed me and asked me to describe my burrito
I'm at a Tim Horton's and two girls just came in handcuffed to eachother
Randomize
