Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
never try to heat up a hot pocket in the dryer if ur microwave breaks...bad idea.
My broken door handle makes it really inconvient for when i need to puke at red lights.
He taped the number 420 over all of his clocks
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
She just admitted to me that she was a pinecone.
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
after tonight, seriously nothing could taste better than toothpaste
1st rule of birth control pills: do not stop taking birth control pills. 2nd rule of birth control pills: do NOT STOP taking birth control pills.
You motherfucker. I just had an MRI with a penny under my boob.
I can't even properly respond cuz I'm ballsdeep in falafel
let me just inform you that suppository-ing xanax is glorious
I tried eating pop-rocks while giving him a bj, I honestly think I was more disappointed with the results than he was.
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
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