Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
Are you pissed because you didn't get action, or the fact i got boned twice in public places tonight?
I left two hundred in singles in your car sorry about the mess
I really need to find a new way to reward you other than head scratches, nutella and blowjobs.
the repo guy said it was the first time he'd ever started to repo a car with someone fucking inside of it. he might have said 'doing it' instead.
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
Your resume just got faxed, I also modified it a bit and sent it to strip clubs...expect weird phone calls...
I wish I could be happy with a nice Christian girl, but no, I need a hot mess who starts bar fights
Just spilled a coffee mug full of scolding hot oatmeal on my bare dick. Hope you're having a good Friday night too.
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
Randomize
