whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
ha- omfg whatt the fuck is wrong w me. Alcohol+third cousins= bad decisions
tiger just fucked it up for all of us...she grabbed my phone this morning and started asking questions.
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
I went to the bathroom like 8 times and each time I looked in the mirror and tried saying "I am sober." I burst out laughing when I got to "so-" every time. If you can't convince yourself, you can't convince anyone else. Fuck it, I'm going upstairs and drinking more.
You make your fellow Jews happy.
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
We were all drunk for the whole flight. Steve doesn't even remember the cab ride to the airport. At 6am. Says he "blacked back in" at security.
Just had to buy plan b w/ my robotic baby from family living.. Awkward.
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
STOP LICKING HIS MUSTACHE
I never actually go in the club. I get in line, hit on a chick, and convince her to come drink all she wants for free at my house.
As a general rule of thumb, I don't call until the claw marks have healed.
I'm writing to thank you for your never ending commitment to my orgasms and also to apologize if any physical harm was done due to your impressive efforts. Hopefully the sex and post sex pizza made up for it.
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
Randomize
