JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
I was still in a towel. We hadn't even started drinking yet and the champagne bottle dropped and exploded literally up into my vagina.
This inappropriate post strip club text brought to you by Cheetah of Palm Beach and vodka. Blowjob in the champagne room and the clap for the low low price of your paycheck.
Has anyone ever told you you're majestic like a sea turtle when you fuck?
And your cock privileges have been revoked.
But break dance skills will only take you so far
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
I'm sorry that running around town like a frenetic wombat trying to find you KY jelly isn't good enough for you.
Get ready tonight we are going to get drunk and pierce my nipples
I was so high I just stared at the papa john's app on my phone and cried
There is eyeliner on my toilet. Vodka and I have a love hate relationship.
Really dude? drunk texts at 9 in the morning? its wednesday
Like at first he was barely doing anything. So I was like harder and then holy shit he's like going all HULK SMASH on my vagina. I mean it felt fucking awesome. BUT STILL
Randomize
