I just realized that all of my cardio comes from dancing on tables.
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
Puked on a Tom Jones impersonator on the strip
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
Future roommate keeps sending me pictures of cool shit she has for our dorm and I'm just like "... I have a set of Aggie wine glasses a great set of tits."
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
People who don't like drugs and guac are not people I chose to associate with
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You told him about your cats? I told his friend to put his dick in my mouth, and you talked about cats!?
Can I chase this vodka with an onion?
Seriously considering modifying my computer case so it can dispense wine. I need to make a bunch of changes and reorganize it's guts anyway....
Just got offered cocaine at ihop. Stay classy America.
No more pre-dentist shots, I just puked on my hygienist
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
Randomize