So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
Do you know my vagina holds 14 pints of water?
I'm having sex on a snuggie, yes i stopped to text you
I just reenacted what a cuntadactyl would act like by putting straws in my mouth as teeth and roaring, Plz come get me.
Apparently blazed enough to think that the sizzling meatballs in the pan were calling your name...Ssssteeeeeve
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
pregamed for the floor meeting. so stoned. i keep thinking my RA is shrinking.
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
Human centipede...with the teletubbies. That's what my nightmare had in it.
I don't even want to know.
I think I've been inadvertently participating in a contest to see how many times I can show up to work hungover in my first year of teaching. And I'm the only participant. Not sure if I'm winning or losing.
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
I can't tell if my need for dick is more than my want to strangle him
I feel like everything in my life has been preparing me for my future sex robot experience
You’re so close!!!
be the chaos you wish to see in the world...
i'm trying to figure out how to respond to that in text
Randomize
