I just sold a pizza for the ability to listen to spice girls.
Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
you wanted the guy to gift wrap the condoms
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
Ryan learned the all important lesson tonight; Red Bull gives you wings, Jaeger gives you gravity.
We're at the urgent care down the street from you if you care to stop by
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
I'd like to request an "its my birthday discount", and for you to bartend shirtless tonight ;)
OMG THE KID WHO TRIED TO MAKE OUT AT THE BAR WITH ME IS SITTIG NEXT TO ME IN THE AIRPORT. WHY LIFE WHY???
Well I can't go home with anyone tonight bc I stuffed my bra
You were drunk enough to sled down a highway off ramp in your pajamas….
Randomize
