I told him to come back in 5mins cause i needed to take a few more shots before i could talk to him
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
How does, "Im sorry I was such an intoxicated bitch, I didn't mean anything I said" sound as an apology.
I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When you start quoting save the last dance you need to stop drinking
Call me old fashioned but i like to drunk dial a girl 2 or 3 times before sending a dick pic
you walked in on him eating me out and screamed SHE'LL BREAK YOUR HEART BRO before body slamming on the ground and passing out on the floor
Thanks for taking care of me. I hope I didn't pee in your car.
I don't want sex or anything I just really need someone to appreciate how shiny my hair is
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I just pulled an onion peel off my boob from sleeping on their kitchen floor
He is getting no nudes from me. I don't even care if I'm losing his legal advice.
Aww well I’m kinda unsober so probably best
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
I'm a delicate orchid of a man.
Blossoming into a fierce dragon.
I'm legitimately the first person in the United States to successfully shave their balls with a Razer Blade of a sword and fully admitt it. I'm honestly smoother then a 10 year old.
Randomize