ive come to the point where weve hung out more times sober than drunk. i think im growing up. fuck.
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
Made it home ok. Only got hit by one car.
Its 6 am and me and the girl in the next apartment have been taking turns puking and yelling "never agaaaain" thru the walls.
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
i honestly don't know why someone didn't cut me off after i broke the ceiling lamp with MY HEAD
and somewhere between crying in her arms and throwing up in her front yard, we became friends.
What does puking wasabi feel like?
Like snorting cocaine backwards.
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
My entire news feed is ice bucket challenges. I wish there was a hide from feed button like FarmVille
just because i'm not a monk anymore doesn't mean I need to tell you about my new sex life.
which is fantastic by the way.
How many gummy vitamins can I eat before I die
my Mom is now my Eskimo sister... she fucked my ex in my bed and took a selfie
Randomize
