My brain says no but my pants say off.
I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
These 31 People Are Lazier Than You Could Ever Imagine
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
Somehow ended up at a stranger's bridal shower. Everyone else is already drunk.
If you fuck her, Im going to call you and I want you to cough 2 times.
She bellyflopped onto the poolside bar, broke one wine bottle, and stole another...the resort staff just frowned and cleaned up her mess.
She's "threw gas on the fire to put it out" drunk. Come retrieve ur gf. Ps she smells like burnt hair
27 Drunk People That Pissed Off The Cops And Got What They Deserved
My mom just called me to tell me that i dont have chlamydia. Awkward.
Hey. Me and my buddy are drunk. you wanna give us tattoos of the hawaiian punch guy we shall pay very well. Seriously dude. no bull shit.
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
I've had your balls on my face a bunch of times so the least you could do is buy a girl some dinner.